Knit Dicks
By: Camie Rigirozzi
Don't suffer from Penis Envy! Make your own! Here are three wonderful cock'n'ball patterns to add some fun and adult humor to knitting. They come in three sizes (kind of like real ones): Small Pecker, Medium Member and Holy Balls! Make them for your poor genital deprived animals or knit several to decorate the house in penis-garland. Enjoy, and try not to get too turned on.
Equipment:
Small amount of cotton yarn Size 3 3.25mm Sticks Tapestry Needle
Pattern:
For each cock'n'balls, make one "balls" and one "cock" (unless you are into science experiments and want to make a 2 dong shlong). Fold the balls in half, and sew up the sides (leave the top open for stuffing). To make realistic nuts in your sack, roll up two small balls of yarn that are the right size (see above), elongated if possible, and put them in place inside the sack before stuffing around the balls with polly-fil. After your sack is stuffed, sew the top shut to keep in the bally goodness. If you want extra ball definition, stitch between the balls. Stuff the penis as well, to your preferred amount of stiffness (too stiff and it might come out the end). Sew the cock to the top middle of the ball sack, and viola! Cock'n'balls.
Small Pecker
Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K1, K2togx2, K2, K2t0gx2, K1 Purl 1 row K1, K2tog, K2, K2tog, K1 Bind off all stitches, leaving a long tail for stitching Balls: CO6 Purl 1 row K1, K1fb, K2, K1fb, K1 Purl 1 row K1, K1fbx2, K2, K1fbx2, K1 Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K1, K2togx2, K2, K2togx2, K1 Purl 1 row K1, K2tog, K2, K2tog, K1 Purl 1 row K1, K1fb, K2, K1fb, K1 Purl 1 row K1, K1fbx2, K2, K1fbx2, K1 Purl 1 row Cock: Co 9, join to work in the round Knit as many rounds as desired (more rounds = longer) \*\*Penis shown has 10 rounds Purl 1 round, add 2 sts in this round Knit 1 round K1, K2tog around K 1 round K2tog around
Medium Member
Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K2, K2tog, K2, K2tog, K3, K2tog, K2, K2tog, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K2togx2, K3, K2togx2, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K2tog, K3, K2tog, K2 Bind Off all stitches, leaving a long tail for stitching Balls: CO9 Purl 1 row K2, K1fb, K3, K1fb, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K1fbx2, K3, K1fbx2, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K1fb, K2, K1fb, K3, K1fb, K2, K1fb, K2 Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K2, K2tog, K2, K2tog, K3, K2tog, K2, K2tog, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K2togx2, K3, K2togx2, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K2tog, K3, K2tog, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K1fb, K3, K1fb, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K1fbx2, K3, K1fbx2, K2 Purl 1 row K2, K1fb, K2, K1fb, K3, K1fb, K2, K1fb, K2 Purl 1 row Cock: Co 12, join to work in the round Knit as many rounds as desired (more rounds = longer) \*\*Penis shown has 15 rounds Purl 1 round, add 2 sts in this round Knit 2 rounds K2, K2tog around K 1 round K1, K2tog around Knit 1 round K2tog around Leave a tail, cut yarn, draw through stitches and fasten off
Holy Balls!
Balls: CO 11 Purl 1 row K3, K1fb, K3, K1fb, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K1fbx2, K3, K1fbx2, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K1fbx4, K3, K1fbx4, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K1fbx2, K4, K1fbx2, K3, K1fbx2, K4, K1fbx2, K3 Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K3, K2togx2, K4, K2togx2, K3, K2togx2, K4, K2togx2, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K2togx4, K3, K2togx4, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K2togx2, K3, K2togx2, K3 Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K3, K1fbx2, K3, K1fbx2, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K1fbx4, K3, K1fbx4, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K1fbx2, K4, K1fbx2, K3, K1fbx2, K4, K1fbx2, K3 Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row Knit 1 row Purl 1 row K3, K2togx2, K4, K2t0gx2, K3, K2togx2, K4, K2togx2, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K2togx4, K3, K2togx4, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K2togx2, K3, K2togx2, K3 Purl 1 row K3, K2tog, K3, K2tog, K3 Bind Off all stitches, leaving a long tail for stitching Cock: Co 15, join to work in the round Knit as many rounds as desired (more rounds = longer) \*\*Penis shown has 20 rounds Purl 1 round, add 4 sts in this round Knit 3 rounds K3, K2tog around (last 4 sts K2, K2tog) K 1 round K2, K2tog around(last 3, K3) K 1 round K1, K2tog around K2tog around Leave a tail, cut yarn, draw through stitches and fasten offl
